Where Have All the GoodGuys Go-o-one??
Well… I’m here to testify to the fact there are still some left. At least here in Houston, there are.
I know I write a LOT about the meanies, the jerks, the not-so-smarts and clueless men swirling around in the cyber-sea of love, but the truth is that there are also some amazing single men (and women!) still out there to discover and subsequently lock down.
In today’s post, I’m going to highlight one great profile and one great date…as exemplars of hope. 🙂
I run across great profiles all the time. Just this last week, I got a well-crafted message from a guy and when I read his profile, I knew I had to share it with all of you – as, at the very least, contrast to all the junk I put up on here.
Here’s what I received… (keep in mind that some of this is funnier to ME because he made joking references to my profile, specifically):
Points for reading enough to be able to reference items from my profile, and for being subtley witty (that third sentence about weeding out the “players” is a sarcastic allusion to the bevvy of girls’ profiles that say that …it’s the equivalent of guys’ “I’m easy-going and laid back).
So, I went to his profile. And it was awesome! From the silly byline to the well-written body, it was a pleasantly normal and charming read. So, naturally, I messaged him back to ask if I could showcase it here. He was gracious and eager to say yes! Here it is:
Now, whether or not you agree with his politics, you have to admit that the prose is refreshing.
And he’s not the only one out there who can still put the proverbial pen to paper and express himself this way…he’s one example of a subset of good guys still on the dating scene….lest you lose hope.
Now… on to a date I had recently.
(Isn’t this fun?)
I met a guy a couple of weeks ago… we’ll call him “David.”
We met through mutual friends and I think there was pretty immediate interest, so we exchanged numbers. The next day, we texted/flirted and he laid down the gauntlet – Miniature golf – loser buys drinks.
I dig the playful element here. But, to sweeten matters even more… the next day I awoke to an email that said…. well, I’ll just show you.
How cute is THAT? And how totally perfect for me? There’s a roguish but sweet feel to this exchange that I loved.
So – what were my house rules? I engaged several friends in brainstorming…I had three goals in mind:
1. Be creative enough that he’d appreciate my mind.
2. Include something that COULD lead to flirty touch, but wouldn’t necessarily if the chemistry wasn’t there.
1. Any time the ball goes outside the designated path, the player must perform the Macarena (I ended up doing this more than he did, sadly)
2. For the FIRST stroke of each hole, the non-playing person would cover the player’s eyes.
3. For every point HE went beyond par for a given hole, we’d take one point OFF of my score. (Ensuring my win…and no drink-buying…)
David picked me up EXACTLY on time (swoon…..) and we weren’t even 2 minutes into the drive before we were laughing, talking and enjoying each others’ company. He told me HIS house rules:
1. Any time either player went beyond 5 strokes, s/he had to yell at the TOP of his/her lungs: “I’m the worst golfer EVER!!!”
2. At the end of the game, we’d add both our scores together and if it was an even number, I had to cook him dinner…and if it was an odd number, he had to cook ME dinner. I had to clarify…”you mean…tonight?” He said – “no! I’m already planning on having another date.” (double swoon…)
3. After hitting a hole in one (if that should happen…which it never did), the first shot of the next hole must be hit with your non-dominant hand.
We arrived at the place and started playing – and it was silliness right from the beginning. We had a blast. This guy is – with some unique differences – a male version of me… forthright, funny, loud, friendly, flirtatious… so how could I not have an amazing time? I was on a date with a handsome version of one of my most favorite people! 🙂
Thanks to my third house rule, I won the game by a landslide, so I dodged the bullet of buying drinks. But, I wonder… would he have made me buy them? Part of me thinks he may have ‘let me off the hook’ because he’s got this strong gentlemanly streak in him – opening doors, being thoughtfully gracious in the way he converses, etc. – that a piece of me thinks he may have footed the bill either way… I guess I’ll never know! Why? Because my ingenious plan was flawlessly crafted in my favor. (Mwah ha ha)
Afterwards, he took to me the charmingly dive-y newly re-opened “Moon Tower Inn” – an outdoor-only highly irreverently marketed craft beer and gourmet hot dog spot. It was perfect.
We (David) bought a round of beer and 2 hot dogs (mine was a delicious lamb sausage with oregano, cilantro…and all on a sinfully white-flour pretzel bun), and we sat on a picnic table and just talked and talked and talked…. and, ok – fine…there may have been some smooching. I mean – c’mon… winning putt-putt AND drinking fancy beer with a cute boy… how could I not?
For fun, we pulled up our OKCupid accounts on our phones and compared profiles – which was actually quite entertaining AND enlightening. Since we hadn’t initially met online, we hadn’t seen each others’ bios/photos yet, so it was another great conversation starter (or…for two talkative people… “conversation ‘continuer’?”)
I saw toward the end of his, that he admitted to loving board games…and I think I audibly gasped in excitement… “NO one still likes nerdy board games! But I LOVE them. That’s too cool!” To which, he replied, (and no. …this wasn’t code for all manner of naughtiness…), “I think we should go back to your place, crack open a bottle of wine and play games.”
And that is precisely what we did.
We played, we laughed, we talked, I kicked his hiney at “SET” (but, to be fair,…he’d never played before and he actually picked it up really quickly. And watching him get excited about learning it was SO attractive), and we just had the nicest time. A bit more smooching and a lot more conversation… and finally we had to give in to fatigue and say goodnight.
It was a fantastic night. It was all the things I love most – an early start (so…lots of time for fun), playful and silly, good conversation, yummy food/drink and connecting with someone of a caliber I haven’t encountered in a while. Oh…and did I mention he loves Jesus? Yeah….
My point in telling you all this is to assure you that – amidst all the horror stories you hear of online dating or dating in later “seasons” of life… there are still funny, intelligent, thoughtful guys out there – single guys – who haven’t yet been snatched up. So… don’t lose hope. They’re out there!
And from time to time, I’ll remind you so.